~Bite-Sized~

It's amazing to me how we try to get through life via leaps and bounds. Many times we are guilty of biting off more than we can handle. I for one always seem to take on more than I can chew. And it always ends the same: I get overwhelmed, I get sick, and it takes me twice as long to get back on my feet!
This has happened to me more times than I can count. In fact, I am just now coming to the end of one of those "getting back on my feet" periods. It feels wonderful right now though. I feel balanced, I feel structured, I feel confident. But I have to be careful to not fall into the same pattern though.
Carissa has taught me many things! Oh how I love her! But watching her eat is so neat. She has her little pudgy adorable fingers, and she picks up the food she wants to eat and puts it in her mouth with intentionality. But because she loves food so much, she is bound to stick more in her mouth than she can handle. That is why, as her parents, we are responsible for breaking it up into little ~bite-sized~ portions for her, and continuously observe her to make she doesn't put too much in her mouth. How similar is that to how I take on more than I should? The only thing is I don't have someone cutting my "food" into ~bite-sized~ portions.
But I can learn another lesson from Carissa that can help me keep from taking on more than I can handle. Carissa is now to where she is learning how to walk. But getting to this point has been a long but exciting process. She wasn't born being able to walk. She first had to learn to hold her head up, then had to learn to roll over, to sit up, to stand while holding something, to learn the concept of taking steps while holding on, and now she is sometimes able to take 2-3 steps at a time without holding on. She is still learning how to find her balance, and until she does she will not be able to take off walking. But she is determined and she will learn when she has it all figured out. But there is a reason there is a cliche called "Taking baby steps." :-D
Thinking about this as I am about to embark on yet another semester in my seemingly life long career as a student, I am reminded that I cannot take on a full load without first mastering my lighter loads. And most of all, I cannot fully "walk" without first finding my balance. I hope to hold onto these ~Bite-Sized~ lessons as I try to master being Mommy, Wife, Melissa, Minister, and Student! :) But Carissa's perseverance gives me motivation and hope! :)

God as Artist

There are many characteristics that could be attributed to God, but this time I want to focus on God as Artist. This is probably a characteristic that is not commonly recognized as an attribute of God, but tonight I saw a demonstration of His artistic capability.

Here I was, driving home from a meeting at Church on an extremely hot day, and looking ahead of me I begin to see heat lightening. A little at first, but before I know it the lightening is stretching across the sky in some amazing patterns. I really cannot describe how beautiful and magnificent this lightening was. It would begin in a central location and completely branch out for all to see. If I had not had a tired baby in the back seat, I would have loved to just pull over and watch it.
(It reminded me of when I was a child at G.A. camp in Florida, and we loved to watch the heat lightening in the evenings.) What a beautiful display of God's artistic personality.

While I was watching this lightening (I was paying attention to my driving, I promise!), so many things crossed my mind. As I share my thoughts, it is my hope that you too can see God as Artist in some capacity.

First: When I think about lightening in general, I think of something extremely powerful, dangerous, but exhilarating to watch. I definitely have a healthy fear of lightening. It is one of those things that I will appreciate from the comfort of my house without getting too close to windows, water, or electrical circuits. But heat lightening I have always found a little less threatening which gives me freedom to appreciate it without trying to hide from it.
Thinking about this, led me straight to God! God is so powerful!! At times, I think we all have a fear of God's power and try to hide from it (especially if it calls for us to change how we are living). And while, yes, we should at times have a healthy fear of God's power, I think He wants us to appreciate it without feeling threatened. He wants to share with us His magnificent power on a beautiful level. And for me, I saw that thru His heat lightening. In a way, it showed me His artistic sensitive side. I feel like it was His way of telling me, "Look, you know I create this lightening. You know it is one representation of my power. But look, my power is something that is beautiful and I want to share it with you. Everything I do is for you; and tonight, I am filling you with the awesomeness of who I am."
This all led me to my second train of thinking:
This lightening was completely amazing and beautiful, and only someone with an artistic flare could create something so magnificent! Lightening is but one mere masterpiece of God's! But stop and take a look around us - smell the roses if you will. This world we live in was a creation by the first artist - the master of art! It is simply amazing when you actually take the time to appreciate it. And sometimes, if we've been neglecting to take the time to appreciate God's masterpiece, He chooses to put one in our path that we cannot ignore - such as a sky full of heat lightening that was the most beautiful thing!!
It's funny when I think about an artist though, I think of someone who really has this inner self that cannot be defined by words alone... but it needs pictures, colors, feeling, etc. And God definitely fits here. There is no way that I could explain to someone the character of God and who He is to me by simply telling them. I just could never find words to describe Him adequately. But seeing God's creative side invokes emotion in me that gives me an understanding of the complexity of whom God is. There is no way I can describe the emotion either, but I hope that others have experienced this same emotion when looking at God's Art! :)
And all of this ultimately brought me to my third line of thinking.
Since the beginning of time, God has been working on his Ultimate Masterpiece: "His Kingdom"! This will be the most glorious masterpiece of all, not only because He is putting so much time and effort into it - but because He uses His creation as tools to create "His Kingdom."
While I may not fully understand the purpose of everything I go through or what I am supposed to do next, I know that God has a specific way that He wants to use me. Some days, I may be a paintbrush that He uses to touch up, or even to start something new. Other days I may be the paint bringing color to someone else's life. Some days, I may be the rag He uses to clean up a blemish - or bring forgiveness to someone. Other days, I am the tenderness that He puts into making sure it is perfectly up to His standards. I know I could probably drag this analogy out ... but I think I will stop there. The point is no matter what things I am dealing with on a day to day basis in my personal life, I know that it will all work together to help God create His Masterpiece!
They key, however, is to not try to do it myself. Unless you are watching Handy Manny, tools do not perform the tasks by themselves. There is always a greater being who puts their abilities to great use! I, for one, am willing to let God use me in any capacity He sees fit. And the next time I feel like complaining about circumstances in my life, I hope to remember that everything works out for a greater good!! :)

Amazing how many things you can think of on a drive home - all because of seeing series of heat lightening! Thanks for listening! :)

Carissa Dances! :)

Time Flies ... !

One year ago from now, I was half way through a pregnancy that would ultimately change my world forever! And here we are ... approaching Carissa's 9th month of life outside of the womb. I cannot believe how much she has changed, grown, and turned into a little person in these last 9 months!
She once upon a time laid helpless in my arms and relied on me to do everything for her. Now, she is determined to do everything herself!
She insists on feeding herself ... she wants to go where she wants to go when she wants to go there and she wants to be the one to go there (if I help her, she decides that's not what she wanted!).
Carissa is working on learning to pull herself up to a standing position. We don't have many things the right height in our house for her, but she has managed to pull herself up in the bathtub - although a bit slippery at times.
I am thinking she may just skip the whole crawling thing all together. She scoots and pushes and pulls and turns .... but no crawling. She'd much rather be standing! In fact ... more and more frequently, she has stood unsupported for like 2 seconds!! That's major progress!! And she loves trying to walk ... holding our hands of course! But she's a pro! Before long I am sure she will be walking!! And she's only 8 1/2 months!!! WOW!
Carissa has SEVEN teeth and I believe she has one on the way!! Definitely a mouthful ... which leads to her love for eating anything - ESPECIALLY mommy and daddy's food! I have officially STOPPED mashing her food. She mostly feeds herself with her fingers. She does like the baby forks, and if we put a piece of food on her fork and hand her the fork, she moves directly to her mouth with the food and eats it off the fork!! Amazing!
And let's not forget that she is going to be a world-class talker! She is working on "bye bye" now. Of course it sounds more like "ba ba ba" ... but she repeats it in response to us saying "bye bye" - which reminds me - She WAVES bye bye! :)
She still doesn't directly call us "ma ma" or "da da" but she definitely tries. Sometimes I think it coincidentally comes out though. And sounds like she says "hi." She babbles up a storm all day long! And she knows what she is saying ... boy I really wish I knew what she was saying. So much personality!!!
She is still nursing ... but only about 3 times a day. I certainly cherish those sessions so much! It saddens me to think that this will one day come to a stop.
My heart swells every time I think about that little girl ... let alone when I get to love on her. I miss her like crazy when I have to be away from her - which reaffirms my decision to work part time at church and stay home with her on a daily basis! God has blessed me so much to allow me to have the job I want while simultaneously having an abundance of time to be the kind of mother I've always dreamed of being!
I have finally gotten things figured out to keep my house in order, while balancing with my weekly church duties, in such a way that I have plenty of time during the day to sit down and play with Carissa without feeling like I am neglecting other duties. It's a wonderful feeling of contentment and accomplishment!
My life has been so blessed over these past 9 months. I have learned a kind of love I never knew before. A kind of love that always brings tears of happiness to my eyes when I think about how much I love my precious Carissa!!
At times it seems like it would be difficult to ever love another child as much as I do her, but then I think about how much joy it will bring me to see Carissa be a big sister. I know with all my heart that God's plan for my life all along was to be a mother and I thank Him everyday for this calling! It's been the best thing that has ever happened to me!!

To be or Not to be ...

Luke 9:20-26

“Then He asked them, ‘Who do you say I am?’ Peter replied, ‘You are the Messiah sent from God!’
Messiah means the Anointed King
What are things typically associated with a king?
How do the people under the rule of the king act in regards to their king?
Christ was the King sent from God …
He had been anointed by the One who had created us … who had created the world we live in. He alone is the One we owe tribute for us even being in existence.

Jesus warned them not to tell anyone this. ‘For I, the Son of Man, must suffer many terrible things,’ He said. ‘I will be rejected by the leaders, the leading priests, and the teachers of religious law. I will be killed, but three days later I will be raised from the dead.’
Jesus, being the One sent by God, predicts His future as one who will be slain by men.
But further, He describes a life of rejection. Jesus was a religious teacher … and yet, he told of how other leaders, priests and teachers would reject Him. You would think that fellow teachers and leaders would at least support his message.
But His prediction does not end with death.
He tells the disciples that after three days of being dead, He WILL raise up from the dead.
Jesus – the Anointed King – would not remain dead.



Then he said to the crowd, ‘If any of you wants to be my follower, you must put aside your selfish ambition, shoulder your cross daily, and follow me.
After Jesus gets done telling everyone what His future holds, he turns to the people and almost dares them to follow Him.
Essentially Jesus is saying, I’ve laid it all out for you. You now know what the cards will hold if you follow me. There will be persecution. There will be rejection. And, you know, there may be death.
But if you love me and are willing to follow me in spite of all these things, here is what you have to do:
First, you can do nothing for yourself. Following me means you recognize that I know best, I have a perfect plan, and we will follow my perfect plan no matter what it is that you think you might want.
Second, you must shoulder your cross every day. I am about to embark on a journey that includes me shouldering a physical cross and carrying it to me ultimate sacrificial death. I am asking that you every day of your life sacrifice your life to me. Give it to me every day. Not just once – but every day. By carrying your cross every day, I will know that you are willing to be obedient. I know that you are willing to give me your life so that you no longer live – but it is I who lives through you.
Third, Follow Me. Now that you know what things may lay ahead, you’ve made up your mind to follow me anyways. You’ve made my desires your own. And you are giving me your life. The next step is to actually take a step. Let’s play a game of follow the leader. I know you don’t know where we are going. But you must trust me to lead the way. The road may get rocky. I promise I will not lead you through harm. I will be here for. Just follow me.

If you try to keep your life for yourself, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for me, you will find true life.
If we are not willing to sacrifice everything to Follow Christ, we are limiting ourselves to things of this world alone. Things of this world cannot be a part of Christ. We must give our lives over to God so that they are no longer of this world so that we may have eternal life with Him.

And how do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose or forfeit your own soul in the process?
If, while we are on this earth, we only busy ourselves with the things of this world – we don’t allow God to have our lives, then what makes us think we will ever be of anything other than this world?
If we only live in worldly matters, we have missed out on things that could be more. Nothing of this world can ever leave this world. And we would lose our souls – which are of God.
We must tend to our souls – our spiritual needs – so that we can leave behind this world to a greater life with Christ in Heaven.



If a person is ashamed of me and my message, I, the Son of Man, will be ashamed of that person when I return in my glory and in the glory of the Father and the holy angels.’”
We’ve been called to be followers of Christ.
Being a follower of Christ means that it will show in everything we do. Our entire being will belong to the Will of God.
Anytime we refuse to do the will of God – we are displaying shame for Christ. And if we are unwilling to let everyone who sees us know that we Know Christ – then why should we expect Christ to claim to know us in front of His Father or the Angels in Heaven?


Critical Reflection

“If this life is most important to you, you will do everything you can to protect it.
You will not want to do anything that might endanger your safety, health, or comfort.
By contrast, if following Jesus is most important, you may find yourself in some very unsafe, unhealthy, and uncomfortable places. You will risk death, but you will not fear it because you know Jesus will raise you to eternal life.
The person who is concerned only with this life has no such assurance.
His earthly life may be longer, but it will most likely be marred by feelings of boredom and worthlessness.”

Reflecting on Holy Week

I started this blog back before Easter ... but unfortunately I got caught up in everyday family life, church life, and a special trip to Kentucky to see my Gramma in the hospital. But I do feel this is a topic that needs to be written about.

Easter is a time of year that always seems to sneak up on us ... and unfortunately, fly by without a great deal of meditation. On Maundy Thursday, we were having our special service at church to remember the Last Supper that Jesus had with his Disciples and the time leading up to his crucifixion and ultimate death. I don't know what made this service different, but I was really moved to stop and think about what I was doing at that service and what I was supposed to be remembering that week.

The past few years I have been a college student, and as a college student Easter-time means one thing: Midterms! There is no extra time for reflection for the meaning of Easter. The ironic thing - I was a RELIGION major studying Jesus Christ. I KNOW what Easter is about. But it's more than just knowing what Easter is all about. "Easter" occurs each year so that we may celebrate and reflect on the resurrection of Jesus Christ. Yes, the traditional Easter Bunny, Easter Egg Hunts, and receiving an Easter Basket full of goodies are great things at Easter-time, but we must not forget why we have Easter. If we do not stop and think about the true meaning behind it all, we have completely missed out on a great deal! My entire future as a Christian, as a human, and as someone with a hope for life after death all lies within the meaning of Easter.

Okay ... so the reason for Easter ... Jesus' resurrection from the grave. But wow! We are missing out on so much if we limit ourselves to Easter Sunday!

Palm Sunday! Jesus returns to Jerusalem. Jesus entered the city ... and all the peoples were praising Him! One would think these people finally had it figured out! Yes! He is the one who has come to save us! He is God's Son! He is the Messiah! Hallelujah! Amen! I mean seriously, these people lined up along the road waving palm branches singing his praise! How great that must have been. If I had been there, I would have never predicted that the very next week these same people would want him dead. But the awe-striking thing is ... Jesus KNEW His fate. He KNEW that these people would kill Him. That must be hard. How do you face people who are singing your praises and not say, "You hypocrites! Here you are praising my name ... but next week you will want me dead!" This has got to be working on the pit of his stomach. He must have been uneasy about all of it!

Maundy Thursday! Jesus gathers with his closest 12. The ones who have given up everything to follow Him for the past 3 years. They have walked beside Him on long journeys. Wondered how they were going to eat at times. Staying in a different place night to night. They gather to have the traditional passover feast as was a customary Jewish tradition. There really shouldn't be anything different about this feast. But all of a sudden, Jesus - the teacher, the leader of this group - gets up and takes the servant's role. He begins to wash their nasty, dirty, worn out feet! Wow! And of course, Peter stops Him and says, "Jesus! What are you doing?! You are our teacher! Please! Let me wash YOUR feet! It should not be the other way around." But Jesus says, "If I do not wash your feet, you will have no part of me." I think there are a few things that can be gathered from that right there. 1. Jesus must be the one to cleanse us from our sin so that we can be with Him. 2. Jesus is taking on a servant role to demonstrate what His followers must do. 3. I think this was a foreshadowing of what was to come. Jesus washing His disciples' feet was unexpected and not the "norm." But it was something He must do in order for His disciples to fully receive what Jesus had to offer. In the same token, Jesus dying a criminal's death was not expected or the "norm" for a so-called Savior/Messiah. But it had to be done. I think it was also a point to the disciples that if they tried to stop Him from what He was about to go through with, they would not be with Him in Heaven.
Just thinking about what must have been going through Jesus' mind through all of this is overwhelming. These are men that Jesus had come to know and care about deeply over the past 3 years. They have spent probably every day together. They have talked together, eaten together, shared together. He loves them as if they were his own flesh and blood ... his brothers, maybe even his children. As a mother, that's a powerful bond. Could you imagine him meeting together with his men, knowing that it would be their last meeting together? What was he thinking about? A normal person might have been thinking: "How do I tell them that they will no longer have me here to guide them? How will they take the news? Will they be able to make it without me? How will they react to me being arrested? Or killed? Will they do something irrational? Will they believe me when I tell them that death is not the end for me?" But Jesus must have known all the answers to those questions already. But He still must have been thinking about them. He must have been thinking about everything, all the while trying to maintain His composure.
And what's more! He was sitting in the room with the very person who was going to sell him out for a little bit of silver! This same man who had been with him for the last 3 years, whom he had loved and cared about, was going to betray Him. And He announced this to the group. Think about it. How easy would it have been for Jesus to have called Him by name, and put a stop to the whole thing. But that would have messed up so much (not to mention the whole laws of whatever science would have been messed up if Jesus predicted something of the future that was changed, then was it really something of the future, and then what would he have to predict - yeah that circle is another topic for someone else haha). But all jokes aside, if Jesus had done that, He could have put a stop to His death - at least for the time being. But He didn't. He simply said ONE OF YOU WILL BETRAY ME! And what did EVERY ONE of them reply? "Surely Not I!!!" That's got to sting Jesus. He must have been thinking something along the lines of "Are you serious? You are going to sit here, and look me in the eye, and tell me surely you wouldn't betray me? Are you serious?" You know ... it's a good thing we have a loving, forgiving, patient, PERFECT Messiah. I sure wouldn't have fit the bill. (Which is why I am human and not God!)

So after all of this, Jesus takes His disciples out to pray in the garden. Jesus is praying so hard and really thinking about all that is about to transpire that he is sweating blood. And what are His disciples doing? SLEEPING! Seriously men! Where is your wake up call? When Jesus is actually led away in handcuffs? Or the dying on the cross part?
But think about it! How often are we like those disciples? Do we pray with earnest? Or are we more likely to fall asleep or let our minds wander while someone else is praying? The disciples had been told that His time with them was coming to an end, and they needed to pray but instead they slept. We have been told that our days are numbered and we must be ready, but instead we spiritually sleep. Where is our wake up call? Jesus has already been killed! How many times must He die before we get the picture? This is why we remember Easter each year! We need a wake up call because we seem to fall asleep throughout the rest of the year!

So anyways ...while they are out in the garden ... here come the guards ... and Judas - who betrays Jesus with a KISS! Nothing like saying I love you, but not more than money.

Good Friday! Jesus is crucified. Jesus is not just killed ... He is killed the death of a criminal. Pilate even offers to release Him to the Jews - as was the custom to release one criminal. But would you believe that those same people who at the beginning of the week were singing His praises were now demanding for a murderer to be released. They wanted Jesus to be crucified!
We've all seen the depictions of Jesus on the cross, or Him carrying His cross to Calvary. But the one movie that hit me hard was Passion of the Christ. It was gruesome! There was a lot of blood!! We've heard it said that Jesus shed His blood for us ... wow this gives it new meaning! I think the part in the movie that hit me hard was after they beat Jesus with the cat of 9 tails - ripping his flesh off his bones literally - his mother came in and began wiping up his blood with her head piece. To see the amount of blood on the floor was breathtaking - and not in a good way. Thinking about all the pain and suffering Jesus went through makes me cringe for real. And then they take him and drive NAILS through his hands and feet and then stand the cross upright. The only thing keeping gravity from pulling him to the ground were the nails in his hands and feet! Oh how that must of hurt!! When I saw the scene of Jesus on the cross in between the two thieves in the movie Passion of the Christ, I couldn't get over the skin coloring portrayed. The two thieves had "white" skin ... not bloody at all. But Jesus' entire body was red from blood from being beat so much before being put on the cross. If you want to think of it this way - Jesus was our scapegoat. The crowds took their shots at Him - I think because they were too prideful to look at their own sin, so it's easier to make someone else look like the bad one! And the ironic thing - Jesus never once did a single thing wrong! Where is the justice in this world?
But you know ........ as horrible as all of this is ..... it saddens me to realize that I am the reason that Jesus went through all of that. Before I was created, He loved me. He felt that I was worth all of this agony He went through. He knew that if He did not go through with this ... if He didn't cleanse me of my sins, I would never be able to spend eternity with Him. For this, this is why we have Easter ever year. This is what we are supposed to reflect on during Holy Week.
We should be humbled by this act of servitude by Jesus. We should be sorrowful that we are sinners. We should have a desire to turn from our sins and do anything that is asked of us by God. We LITERALLY owe God our lives!! It is not a figure of speech because we should do something for Him, it is a literal thing: Jesus LITERALLY gave His life when He was brutally MURDERED on our behalf. The LEAST we can do is serve Him! Don't we owe Him that much?

The following song was playing while we took communion at the Maundy Thursday service. I had heard the song before, but to sit in silence and really listen to these words during this service - when I was already deep in reflection - was very touching. I can't explain it. Except that I am the reason that Jesus was named a criminal and killed as such. He took on all of our crimes and paid our debt so that we will never have to. Because of Him we are free peoples.

Glory Revealed - By His Wounds Lyrics

(Feat. Mac Powell, Mark Hall, Steven Curtis Chapman and Brian Littrell)

Isaiah 53:5

He was pierced for our transgressions
He was crushed for our sins
The punishment that brought us peace was upon Him
And by His wounds, by His wounds we are healed

He was pierced for our transgressions
He was crushed for our sins
The punishment that brought us peace was upon Him
And by His wounds, by His wounds we are healed

We are healed by Your sacrifice
And the life that You gave
We are healed for You paid the price
By Your grace we are saved
We are saved

He was pierced for our transgressions
And crushed for our sins
The punishment that brought us peace was upon Him
And by His wounds, by His wounds we are healed

We are healed by Your sacrifice
And the life that You gave
We are healed for You paid the price
By Your grace we are saved
We are saved

He was pierced for our transgressions
He was crushed for our sins
The punishment that brought us peace was upon Him
And by His wounds, by His wounds we are healed
And by His wounds, by His wounds

What can wash away my sin?
Nothing but the blood of Jesus

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I want to pose a question.
If you were to have gotten into a bad car accident that left you trapped in the car with death imminent. (Even go as far as to say that accident was your fault.) While you are trapped, so many people have driven by and ignored you. Maybe some have stopped, but they simply just told you what to do but didn't want to do anything themselves. They felt that you got yourself in to the situation, you should get yourself out. But then, just when you've come to terms with dying, a stranger stops and puts his/her life at risk to save yours. How would you repay that person? I don't know about you, but I feel that I would be forever indebted to that person. I sure wouldn't treat them like a burden or put them on the back burner. I've just made a new best friend and would be continually repaying them forever.

Isn't that the way we should be with God? We are alive because He DIED - literally!

But you want to know the great thing about the God we serve? He didn't just die ... He conquered death itself and came back to life. Not too many people can make that claim. And because He conquered Death from Satan, we know that our God is The All Most Powerful! I am glad that My God is the best in the world! He is the ONLY GOD! All other gods are nothing. Satan has no power over me because I belong to Jesus Christ - the one who has defeated Satan once and for all.

THIS IS WHY WE HAVE EASTER!!
I know it has passed this year. But that doesn't mean you can't reflect on this throughout the year. But when Holy Week comes next year ... don't let it sneak up and pass by without giving it any reflection!!

Karate Baby