Good-bye SuperMom

I know. I know. 

SuperMom does not exist. 

So why do I try to be her? 

It has only been 68 days since my body brought forth a brand new human being. The entire process of creating this new person took approximately 280 days. 280 days of changing my hormones, stretching my body in ways that don't seem possible, exhausting my body's energy reserves, and overall changing me into a new mommy - again. These past 68 days only equate to about 1/4 of the time it took to miraculously make our beautiful daughter. 

Can I really expect my body, my hormones, my energy, and my emotions to be back to "normal"?

And not only is my body working on figuring out its new normal, we now have to figure out how to function as a family with 3 kids. It has been almost 4 years since we last had a baby in our house. Either my brain is foggy from all the time passed between our 2nd and 3rd babies, or this little lady cries more, nurses more, needs to be held more, and will only sleep with Mommy more than the other two. Did the first two really scream if Daddy held them? 

I guess if I think really hard and am truly honest, yes my babies were all needy.

 But then again, they are babies. 

 They NEED their mommy.

It is okay that we have days of just sitting on the couch because the growing-like-a-weed two month old NEEDS nourishment to help her growing body. 

It is okay if I can't get much done because I am holding a wee one who NEEDS to feel the security of being close to Mommy - in turn, learning how to trust. 

More importantly, learning how to trust that Mommy will always be there to meet her needs and take care of her. 

It is okay to snuggle with a sleeping baby because she NEEDS to hear my heartbeat and smell my scent to help her sleep - after all, she will only need this kind of comfort for a short span of her life. 

It is even okay that my big girls are spending more time learning how to entertain themselves, get along, and learn the responsibility of being Mommy's big helper because the baby NEEDS Mommy in ways they don't anymore. 

When they were each babies, I sat with them, held them, snuggled their sleeping bodies, and allowed my world to revolve around each of them while they were helpless babes in need of their mommy. Now a new babe has joined our family in need of her mommy in the same exact ways. And for the time being, we do whatever we need to do to meet the needs that need to be met, and survive this season with love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and even self-control.

I must make a confession. My days have not been filled with all those virtues. I have been hard on myself for not being able to fit into my pre-pregnancy clothes comfortably yet. I have been hard on myself for not being on routine yet. I have been impatient with my loved ones. I have been hard on myself for not keeping my house clean. I have even been hard on myself for stressing over these things and being impatient with myself. Don't you love that? 

Being impatient with myself for not being patient with myself. 

I think I just need to give myself grace all around.

"Each time he said, 'My grace is all you need. 

My power works best in weakness.'

So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, 

so that the power of Christ can work through me."

2 Corinthians 12:9

A Year in a Blink

I closed my eyes for just a second and when I opened them an entire year had passed.
Well, that's how it feels anyway.
Shamefully, I neglected this blog this past year. So much has changed from a year ago, that I always felt I couldn't just "pick up where I left off" ... it needed some segue, so I procrastinated. (What else is new?)
So here I am to try and pick back up, ready for a New Year.

In 2011, we moved to Virginia from North Carolina. We now live with David's grandmother (we help her with the cooking and cleaning and such :)) in the house that David's parents own. We have been so blessed with this living arrangement because we have been unsuccessful with selling or renting our North Carolina house.
In 2011, we joined the church that David went to as a youth - the church that took him to World Changers back in 2000 when we met :) ... It is such a wonderful place to worship God without feeling like it has become a duty, rather it is a delight. I have joined the choir, and ensemble, and help lead the Preschool choir. The girls are enjoying their classes as well. Carissa loves preschool choir, Sunday school, and Mission Friends. And David is a member of the Hand Bell choir. We very much enjoy our young marrieds' Sunday school class, and have made wonderful new friends. Such a blessing!
In 2011, David FINALLY got a job with his degree - making about what we were both making combined in 2010. He enjoys his job and is currently studying to work on getting certifications so he can continue to move up in his field! What an answer to prayers!
In 2011, I developed a love (and discovered a talent) for sewing! I started out with sewing (and selling) cloth diapers! I learned a lot from that experience! Biggest lesson was that if I am going to run a WAHM business, I have to make it fit my family - not make my family fit my business. I began by taking custom orders, only to realize how huge the demand was! I absolutely could not keep up! My poor children and the condition of my home were neglected miserably, and I was so stressed trying to get all the diapers finished in a timely manner for customers. On top of all of that, I hit a few bumps along the way with the functionality of the diapers that I had to fix and ended up replacing diapers. Yow! Can you say OVERWHELMED? I had to take a huge step back. I attempted to get caught up and then create a stock. I had a lot of people anxious for me to "reopen" so I set a date for them, only I wasn't ready in time. I worked round the clock and stressed myself out to get a decent stock made (and still didn't finish what I'd hoped to), and half of what I did finish sold almost immediately. But whenever I pushed myself to make a lot of diapers to meet a deadline, I crashed and burned and the idea of sewing more diapers did not appeal to me. So I took another step back, and have pretty much just set that business aside - temporarily.  I started sewing other things for fun to rekindle my love of creating. I have decided that I do not want to limit myself to just sewing cloth diapers. I want to be able to enjoy making a variety of items - at my own pace. So now I plan to SLOWLY work on building a "boutique" of sorts - and I will open ONLY when I am completely satisfied with my available stock, and have my patterns and kinks worked out. (Check out my sewing blog for the latest on my projects: Sewtastic Fun )

In 2011, I became a Mary Kay Independent Beauty Consultant. While I thoroughly enjoy my sewing businesses, I have to put in a lot of time to make much of a profit right now. Some pieces of the puzzle came together and this opportunity opened up for me. I really enjoy this! It has been slow going for me as of yet (but I truly don't want to burn out on something else on my plate). I am working on getting things organized and ready to make the most of 2012 - and hopefully start having consistent events so that I can start adding to our family's income.

In 2011, we celebrated Kathryn's 1st Birthday and Carissa's 3rd birthday! My how they are growing up SO quickly!!! Both of them are extremely talkative - really ... I don't have any idea where they could have picked that up ;) .... Hmm. They are super sisters. They truly love each other and are always thinking of the other. I will have to post future blogs to highlight their development and personalities because I could write a lot about them! They are my pride and joy for sure! :)

In 2011,  God had taught me one major lesson: I need to stop trying to leave the season of life God has me in, because He has me here for a reason. Instead, I need to step back and see Him at work. I have seen countless accounts of God showing me the reason we are where we are. This was not what we had planned by any means, and it was not the best of circumstances that headed us down this path. But all of 2010, I ignored what I knew in my gut God was telling me to do, and I was miserable. Allowing Him to take the reigns and just trusting that He will provide has proven to be the best thing ever. Our life is 100x better this year than it was last year, and I owe Him all the praise! I know we are still on a journey. But I feel my trust, my faith, and my patience have all grown a lot in the last year! I know God has big things in store for us! And I am anxiously looking forward to all that 2012 has in store for us!! :)

"For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." - Jeremiah 29:11

Diapers ...

... Cloth Diapers that is!

So almost 3 years ago (when I found out I was pregnant with my sweet Carissa) if you had said "Cloth Diapers" to me, I would have immediately thought about the cloth diapers my mom used on my brother when we were little. Not what I wanted to attempt. So I never gave cloth diapers a second thought.

Here I am - 6 months after having my second child and was introduced to the new world of cloth diapers.

I am apart of an online community for moms who all were due in June 2010. We all talk on a daily basis via facebook. Many of these moms use cloth diapers and talk about how much they love them. I started researching cloth diapers and was amazed at how much they have changed since I was little.

One of my mommy friends went back to work full time, which left her cloth diapering only part time. She decided to bless me and my family by sending us enough cloth diapers to get us started that she no longer was using! What a blessing!

Tomorrow will conclude our entire first week of exclusive cloth diapering. I could not imagine using disposables again. I am still learning things, and I am developing my own preferences. We plan to use the money we save each month on diapers and wet wipes (Yes! I am using cloth wipes as well!!) to buy more cloth diapers and wipes until we have a nice collection of the ones we like.

So here are some things I am learning.

Everyone has their own preferences.

Some moms swear by certain brands or styles, while others have nothing good to say about those same brands. If I poll a group of cloth diapering moms, I will get 20 different answers for what is recommended or their favorites. And I am already seeing how my own preferences are differing from those.

My preferences:

Velcro is the way to go! 

My child does not stay laying on her back for longer than 2 seconds ever. Definitely makes changing diapers challenging. Some of the diapers I have are snap-closed. They have many different snaps to adjust for a better fit. But when you have a child who is flipping over as quickly as you lay her down, it is a pain to try and find the right snap. And each flap has 2-3 snaps ... that is 4-6 snaps to close while trying to hold a child down! Oh, and sometimes I get them all snapped and realize it is too tight or too loose, and I have to take them apart and start all over. And getting Daddy to get them on - well, bless his heart!

Having diapers that have Velcro make it quicker, easier, and the exact fit the first try (okay, so sometimes the second try depending on how much she is moving).

One Size!

I love being able to use the same diaper for Kathryn and Carissa! I don't have to keep buying new diapers as they get bigger. And if I combine the Velcro and the one size, I am able to get a customized fit specially for each girly without a whole lot of hassle. 

Pockets

For those who are unfamiliar with cloth diapers, ones with pockets have the waterproof outside and a pocket on the inside.You stuff the pocket with a liner for absorbency. 

When it comes to washing, you pull the liner out and wash. The outer layer hangs to dry to protect the waterproof layer, but the liners can be dried in the dryer. 

They have ones with the built in liners, but those take much longer to dry.

And then there are covers that you can put over pre-folds or liners etc. It's nice because the covers can  be wiped off and used again with a new liner/pre-fold ... but when you have a squirmy little one, it becomes quite a challenge to get the liners lined up right and fasten the cover for optimal absorbency. 

BumGenius

My friend sent me quite a variety of different kinds to try.

Rump-a-Rooz - This one has the pocket that I like but it has snaps.

Dream-Eze - These have a sewn in liner, have snaps, and are a size small.

Jamtots - I have a small and a medium. They have liners that can be snapped in, and they snap close.

Fuzzi-Buns - This one has the pocket that I like. It is one size with adjustable elastic in the legs and waist. And it snaps closed. 

GroBaby - Has liners that snap in. They do Velcro close, but they don't fit all the way up to Carissa. And I have had nighttime leakage from these.

Thirsties - I have one small fitted and three covers. I like the fitted one, but then you also have to have the cover to put over it and of course you have to buy a new size when she outgrows it (but it is velcro). The covers work over any of the liners or prefolds (and the fitted), but goes back to the struggle of getting them on her right with her flipping over. But for travel purposes, it is easier to bring multiple liners and one cover than multiple all-in-one diapers.

BumGenius - These have the pockets. They have two different size liners for me to choose depending on which child I am using it on - or if I want to double up for nighttime protection. They are the only ones I have that fit both Kathryn and Carissa. They Velcro closed. And they are the only ones I have tried that have not leaked at night. When Daddy does the diapering, I try to be sure he has one of these. It is the same technique to put on as putting on a disposable - only much softer and prettier.

I feel like these are the diapers that work best for our needs, so I think we will stick to stocking up on BumGenius diapers. (Special hint to family looking for Christmas ideas (or friends looking to get your own stock) .... BumGenius is running a special Buy 5, get 1 Free! *wink wink*)

And of course, if any of my cloth diapering mamas have a brand that you feel has all my preferences and you think I should try those too ... let me know!

Extra work ... but super easy!

 Definitely going with cloth diapers takes a few extra steps, but so worth it and not hard.

After about a week now, I feel like I have settled into a nice routine that works for me.

I have enough that I could probably get away with washing every other day, but I think if I did that I would be cutting it really close. I know my days can be unpredictable, so to be on the safe side I am washing everyday for now - at least until I have increased my supply with more of the ones we like best.

Here is my routine:

After the girls wake, I change them both out of their night time diapers. (Kathryn gets a fresh cloth diaper, while Carissa gets panties.)

All diapers and wipes are stored in the trash can we use in Kathryn's room. (It is a small can with a lid that has a foot pedal. Right now I just have the plastic bags I've always used for this can, and will just change the bag every week.)

I take the can (which generally is loosely full by this point) to the laundry room.

I disassemble the diapers as I add them to the washer, securing the Velcro tabs on the special laundry tabs.

First cycle is just a cold, gentle wash/rinse cycle with no detergent - to get all the loose stuff off.

Next cycle I do a Hot regular wash, with cold rinse (my washer only does cold rinses) with a small amount of Arm & Hammer Essentials detergent.

Last cycle is just another gentle rinse to make sure all the detergent is fully rinsed.

I then hang the outer diapers on my makeshift indoor close line.

All the liners and cloth wipes go into the dryer on low heat until they are dry (usually takes about an hour for them to be completely dry.

After the girls go to bed at night, I gather up the liners from the dryer and my line-dried diapers and sit on the couch (usually watching TV or talking to David etc). I put the liners in the pockets and prep all the diapers for the next day.

And lastly, I prep my cloth wipes for the next day.

Oddly enough, having this task to do daily helps me form routines to my day. I actually enjoy this process.

Special Cleaning

Okay, so I don't have much experience in this department yet.

Main thing separate from my above cleaning is the poopy ... and all I do for that is shake it off into the toilet and give it a little rinse before sticking it in the "diaper pail."

The only other "special cleaning" I found and have used is in cases of diaper rash. Kathryn had a little bit of a rash due to teething recently. I researched options and here is what I settled on:

I put a cotton liner in the diaper directly against her bum, so that I could use the diaper cream but it only got on the liner.

When I changed that diaper, the liner and the wipe went into the sink until I had a chance to take care of it.

I would then use a little Dawn dish soap (the blue kind) to clean the diaper cream off the liner. I would rinse it all off and if there was still cream, I would repeat until it was all gone. Once I made sure there was no more signs of cream on the liner, I washed it like normal.

Worked wonderfully!

Cloth Wipes

One of my favorite things!!

My friend sent me some wipes with the diapers and I just love these! (I need to find out where she got these so I can get more like them.)

I researched wipe solutions and finally decided what I wanted to do.

My wipe solution:

1/4 cup Baby Oil (with Aloe and Vitamin E)

1/4 cup Baby Wash (just the regular yellow bottle)

4 cups water

(When mixing, add the water first to prevent bubbles.)

I made my solution in a storage container from my kitchen. I put my wipes in a regular wipe container and poured some solution over them (just enough to moisten the wipes). As I use them, I pull one out, wring it out, and am able to use one wipe per change (unless there is a massive mess - but generally I am able to utilize all sides of the wipe etc). Each night when I prep them, I put the wipes in the containers (one for the living room and one for the changing table), and add solution as needed.

These wipes work great for more than just diaper use! They work wonderfully for cleaning faces, hands, or giving a quick wipe down of whole body. The solution is safe, smells wonderfully, and leaves them fresh and soft.

So in all, I am extremely satisfied with my cloth diapers and most of all, my girls seem to really like them as well. This will save me about $60+ a month in diapers, pull ups, and wet wipes. And next time we have a kid, he/she will be cloth diapered from the start! I am ever so grateful to my friend for passing along blessings!

Anyone on the fence about cloth diapering ... my suggestion would be to give it a shot! :)

Carissa-isms

Our little (almost) 27 month old is quite the entertainer. You would not think she is only 27 months for how well she talks. She does not talk baby talk and very few words does she mess up. She still says "Kafryn" ... but she can say her "th" when she says "this" or "that" or "there" etc. She speaks perfect sentences - articles, verbs, nouns, pronouns, etc - in the proper order. Absolutely outstanding.
So with her wildly large vocabulary and conversation skills, she is also developing quite the imagination and basic thought processes. I really need to start writing down all the little things she says or does that crack me up!

I decided to go ahead and journal some highlighted favorites:

* While starting to lose her balance, she said, "Woooooaaaahhh! I'm okaaaay!"

* Anytime Kathryn starts pulling at her she says, "Kafryn!! Don't ... get ... me!!"

* She was sitting on a blanket on the floor and had pulled the sides of the blanket up around her and said, "I'm in a boat. Great idea Rissa!"

* We have a pump for an exercise ball, and it has a long blue tube (kind of like a flexible straw) that she has been playing with as if it were a stethoscope. She will go up to someone and say, "Rissa measure __(name of person/animal)__'s heart" while putting it up the way a doctor does.

* Today she had me crawl on the floor with her so we could "creepy crawl past dragon's cave." And when I asked her where the dragon's cave was, she took me to the window, and we had to hide behind the curtains from the dragon.

* Out of the blue tonight she said, "Dash speak Spanish." Dash is the dog. Thank you Dora for teaching my daughter that animals can speak.

* She has started a new kick of her "favorite" things. Today she came and said, "Rissa want 'nother favorite snack." I had no idea what snack she was referring to, so we went in the kitchen to find it. She had me open the fridge, and she looked. She pointed to the produce bin and said, "in there." So I opened it and she looked some more. Then pointed at the lunchmeat/cheese bin and said, "in there." I opened it and she looked and chose some cheese. While she was eating her cheese the dogs came up to her and I heard her say, "No ... this Rissa's favorite snack ... favorite cheese."
    .......... Then later in the day, she told me she wanted "Rissa's favorite food." And when I asked her what Rissa's favorite food was, she thought a min and said, "Cake ... yeah!" Silly girl.

* Normally when she gets a boo boo and asks me to kiss it, I ask her to let me look at it. So now anytime she gets a boo boo, she comes to show me and says, "Mommy, look it boo boo on _(bodypart)___ ... kiss it!"

* She says "Look it this" a lot! She loves showing us things!

*She has also started the questions! She says, "What's in there?" or "What is it/that?" or "Where'd __(something)___ go?"
      The cutest time ... We were loading up to go to GiGi and Papa's for Thanksgiving and Daddy had already loaded her little potty in the car. She needed to go potty and she looked all around and seemed frustrated and said, "Where did Rissa's potty go?"

*Today she randomly started singing, "Santa Claus coming to town." We've been talking to her about Santa this year, and she's seen him on TV or pictures and even had her picture taken with them. Well, tonight she was on a kick of "Want Santa bring you presents!" At one point I asked her what kind of present and she said, "Dora presents!"

* Her Great-Grandma (Ninny) and her Great-Great-Grandma (Mema) were just here for a visit and she loved that! She would come and get Mema's finger and say, "Come on Mema" and take her somewhere. But the funniest thing was David had been throwing her in the air and when he got tired from throwing a 36lb girl in the air, she turned put her hands up to her GREAT-GREAT-Grandmother and said, "how bout Mema throw Rissa" Oh that was too funny! There was no way Mema could have lifted that big girl - let alone throw her in the air lol!

* This one bout broke my heart! I took Ninny and Mema back to the airport early this morning while Carissa was still sleeping. When I got home, she ran to greet me saying, "Mommy!! Ninny!! Mema!!" As soon as she realized I was alone she looked sad and said, "Mommy, where's Ninny and Mema?" I love how she loves them and how attached she gets to people she loves!

* David has a screen saver on his computer that is bubbles. She loves to pop bubbles, so they pretend to pop them on his screen. Today she went up to him and said, "Rissa pop bubbles Daddy puter."

* We have MarioKart on the Wii ...and one of the tracks is called "Moo Moo Meadows" and has cows on it. Carissa loves that and will occasionally grab a Wii-mote and say, "Rissa race cows"

And best of all ... She has started going around and randomly saying, "This is Rissa Gunter ... That's Mommy ... That's Kafryn ..." and name everyone. And if you ask her, "What's your name?" She says, "name Rissa Gunter" Oh I love it!!

I am sure I could think of many more. And I'm sure I could fill a notebook if I wrote them down as she says things. I hope you have enjoyed our Carissa-isms as much as we have! :)

<> Baby Scientist <>

My girls are now both officially scientists ... well, they've participated in child development studies for Duke University. I imagine Duke University receives a list of babies who receive birth certificates in the surrounding counties, and they contact these bubbly new parents. 

When Carissa was a baby, we were asked to participate in their study; and Kathryn was also just invited. They were working on the same study both times, but the activity was slightly different.

They are conducting a study to see what babies understand about quantity before they know numbers or how to count etc. (For example, if you put 10 cheerios in one pile and 3 in a different pile, will infants go for the one with more? etc)

With Carissa, she sat in a high chair in front of a computer screen. The screen flashed different sizes and numbers of little dots. They video taped to see if she showed any interest in the ones with more dots etc.

     The results ... who knows. She got fussy haha.

With Kathryn, she also sat in a high chair (and ended up in my lap when she got antsy and kept trying to turn and get me). But they had three screens in front of her (one directly in front of her, and one to the left and one to the right). The first "test" they had a constant number of dots on one screen, while the other screen changed quantities and the second test they had cats and mice - one screen had the same number of mice and cats, while the other changed the ratio between the two etc. The theory behind this is that if she recognized different quantities, she might pay more attention to the one changing quantities, etc. Every minute there would be a little break, and during this break there was a color pinwheel that spun on the screen directly in front of her. She loved that pinwheel. She watched it until it went away and the other screens lit up. She looked at one screen, then the other, back to the first, and decided to play with the chair or talk, and look around - but every time that pinwheel came back on, she stopped and stared at it, and repeated her process of checking out each screen. Apparently the dots, mice, and cats were boring because she looked at them for a second and played with something else.

I really don't know if my girls contributed to their study in any concrete way, but they received little certificates saying that are baby scientists.It was kind of neat to let them take part in a study for educational purposes. :)

Dr. Mommy

Probably one of the hardest things about being a mom is seeing your precious babies sick. I wish I could just snap my fingers and make my little girls better. Although, while I can't magically make my baby girls all better, I do have healing powers of sorts.

... Hugs ...

When my girlies are sick, they just want mommy to hold them. There is something so comforting about hugs from mommy when you aren't feeling well. When my babies are sick, I just want to hug them and never let go.

... Kisses ...

I love how mommy's kisses can make anything better. My poor Carissa had a sore throat and told me, "Mommy ... kiss it." Melts my heart.

... Nursing ...

This is my real super power. Who needs medicine when you have mommy's milk? My sweet Kathryn is so young still and really should avoid having most medicines. But every time I nurse her, she is receiving a whopping dose of antibodies that are specifically formed to meet her needs. It is such a fascinating process! When Kathryn is exposed to germs, she nurses and passes the germs to my body. My body immediately gets to work making antibodies to help her fight off those germs. The next time she nurses she receives special germ-fighting milk!

Another medicinal function of mommy's milk is something like a throat lozenge. Kathryn woke herself up tonight having a major coughing fit - you know, one of those uncontrollable ones due to a really itchy throat? I nursed her, it soothed her throat, she fell back to sleep, and hasn't coughed since.

On top of all the wonderful powers of mommy's milk, the act of nursing also has healing powers. The comfort of being close to mommy, the relaxation that comes from nursing, and the overall calm that ultimately helps her immune system do what it needs to do without the extra obstacle called stress.                        

There is such a heart-warming feeling when you see your sick baby finally fall asleep peacefully, or have them cuddle up on your chest, or see them muster up a smile or laugh even though they feel sick.

I love my babies. I hate when they are sick.

But I love my job as their mommy, and my maternal abilities to make them better.

More Imitation

The day after I wrote my last blog, Carissa and I had another feast with her kitchen set. I began to cut my "food" with my fork on my left hand, and the knife in my right - cutting between the prongs of the fork. Carissa also started cutting her "food" too. I tried taking a picture of her doing it. Even though I paused my cutting long enough to snap a picture, I managed to catch one of her sneaking a peak at my fork/knife :) 

I just love how this picture shows her inquisitive look while mastering a new skill she saw mommy do!

Love.

Imitation is Flattery

When I have looked at this picture, I always assumed Carissa was looking at Kathryn. While talking about this photo with my mother-in-law, she pointed out that Carissa is looking at me, and holding the bear in the same fashion I am holding Kathryn. She said she loves it because Carissa is imitating me, and imitation is the biggest form of flattery.

I always knew that Carissa learned things from seeing or hearing me do things, and I try to make an intentional effort to demonstrate good practices that I want her to pick up. And I often chuckle or beam with pride when I see her do something or hear her say something that I know she learned from me.

But until this conversation with my MIL, I had never really paid attention to Carissa's process of watching me. I have started watching her watch me, and oh I wish I could describe with words the feelings that brings. It is simply amazing to see her look at me, study my movements, and immediately try to do them herself.

My biggest example was from earlier this evening. GiGi and Papa have this Little Tikes kitchen they bought when Carissa was in my tummy and finally brought it out of their basement today. But sadly, there weren't any dishes to go with it. After dinner out, GiGi ran into the store and bought Carissa a set of dishes to go with her kitchen set. The dishes included a couple pans with lids, a tea kettle, a ladle and spatula, salt and pepper shakers, and 2 sets of plates, cups, forks, knives, and spoons. While Kathryn took a nap, mommy got to spend some special playtime with Carissa. We poured tea into our cups and drank them. We served some soup and ate it. We added salt and pepper to our meals. Washed our hands before we ate. Washed dishes etc. It was loads of fun.

But what I enjoyed most of this time was watching her copy me. After she poured me "more tea" I took the spoon to stir my tea. She picked up her spoon and began stirring her tea. But as she was stirring she was looking at me, studying how I was stirring my tea, and trying to mirror my movements. My heart swelled.

Imitation truly is the biggest form of flattery - especially for a mother whose two year old daughter tries to imitate her. For me, that means Carissa views me as someone worth imitating. She wants to me like mommy. What an honor! And what a responsibility. I pray that I am able to do right by her and set a good model for her to imitate. I know that I am already seeing a reflection of myself in her, and I pray to God that I am able to always see a reflection that I am proud of ... but most of all, that God is proud of. Oh how I love being a mommy. God could not have given me a better job in the world. This is by far the best job ever, and is definitely the most important ministry that God could ever have asked me to do. All I can say is I have found my calling!

Thank you God for my beautiful girls! Amen.

A Quarter of a Century

Quiet places often lead to reflection. I am sitting here at my in-laws, David is back in NC working, both of my girls have been sleeping for over an hour now, David's parents are both at work, his brother has been quietly working on his computer, and his soon-to-be sister-in-law is taking a nap. I am not used to having this much quiet. At home I would have filled this quiet with trying to accomplish a huge to-do-list. But alas, I am able to think (which could be dangerous).
Every year this season sneaks up on us so quickly. This year so much has been happening, and now I am sitting here thinking about what the future holds. I looked at the date and realized today is the 23rd of November .... already?! Wait ... that means .... Tomorrow I turn twenty-five years old!? When did I grow up so quickly? Wasn't I just in high school? Where does time go?
It's funny though, 25 means I am a quarter of a century old now ... but it doesn't feel very special lol. But you know, in just a mere 25 years I have a lot to be proud of.

• I survived being the oldest of 5 children.
• I was always active in my church.
• I twirled baton for 9 years.
• I played soccer for 4 years.
• I have read every hardback classic Nancy Drew book (you know, the yellow ones?)
• I was baptized 4 days before my 9th birthday.
• I finished K-12 with straight A's.
• I graduated Valedictorian.
• I earned 3 full tuition scholarships (although only used one).
• I participated in World Changers every year from 6th grade-12th grade, and have since taken a group as the leader for 3 years.
• I met my husband 10 1/2 years ago!
• I have a Bachelor of Arts in Religion and Christian Ministry (and have some of a Master of Divinity finished).
• I graduated college as Cum Laude.
• I got my first job as a bagger for Winn-Dixie when I was 15 years old, and by the time I quit that job 6 years later, I was an Assistant Customer Service Manager.
• I finished my undergraduate school in 3 1/2 years (but the last semester was also my first semester of graduate school).
• I got engaged on February 24, 2006.
• I got married on June 23, 2007.
• Bought our first house April 2008.
• I found out I was pregnant with our first child on January 23, 2008. Found out in April she was a girl. And gave birth to my beautiful Carissa on September 21, 2008.
• I found out on September 28, 2009 that I was pregnant with our second. Found out January that she was a girl. And gave birth to my precious Kathryn on June 9, 2010!

I probably could come up with so many more things to add. I could also create a list of the not-so-nice things that have happened in these last 25 years, but somehow the list of the great things has a way of outshining the bad.
I look at where I came from, at how immature I was growing up, and I look at my life now and I am so blessed. I love my life. Sure we still hit bumps in the road. But because of who I am, who God is, and the wonderful man God created to be my husband, I know I will always have reason to be thankful.
Sunday, the sermon was about being Thankful - makes sense with Thanksgiving this week. But it wasn't about just being thankful for the things we have. But rather, in all things we should be thankful. In times of happiness, we should be thankful. In times of struggle, we should be thankful. In saddness, we should be thankful. etc. And I know that I have many reasons to always be thankful, no matter what comes my way.
So while I don't know what the next 25 years will hold, I know that because of my first 25 years I will always be blessed with a wonderful life and family.
Happy Birthday to me and Happy Thanksgiving to everyone else :)

"Like Mother, Like Daughter"

     Over the summer, I read an article in a Homelife Magazine that I really liked. It was titled "Like Mother, Like Daughter" and had a list with 10 things a mother should do to set a good example for her daughters. I jotted down the main list to write about later ... and now is later.

     As I watch my daughters grow and learn, there is one thing that is extremely obvious. They learn what they see. They copy other people's behaviors, and say what they hear other people say - especially things they see and hear Mommy and Daddy say.

     When I was growing up, my mom used to say "Do as I say, not as I do." I have always hated that saying. And often my retort was "What you do speaks so loud that I cannot hear what you are saying" or "Actions speak louder than words." When it comes to raising children, it is so important to remember that parents must model good behaviors so their children will see a good demonstration of what is expected. If what I do does not match what I am trying to teach my children with words, my attempts are futile. Before children even have a vocabulary or have language comprehension, they learn from watching those around them.

A country song has a line that I love. It says, "I'm gonna be the kind of woman I want my daughter to be." That is my goal in life. 

With that being said, here is that list of things a mother should be sure to do to teach her daughter well.

• Reading your Bible and praying
•  It is so important for me to show my children how to have a relationship with God. They can learn things from church, but it ultimately falls on my shoulders to teach them how to practice what they are learning at church. If I want them to carry their faith with them when they grow up and start a family of their own, then I need to show them how to make it part of their daily life.
• Treating your husband with respect
• How I, as a wife, treat my husband will lay the foundations that will go with my daughters when they get married. I want my daughters to have healthy loving relationships that thrive and succeed. If I can set a good example for my daughters now, then maybe I can help them make good decisions when it comes to getting married that will ultimately help prevent a potential divorce or years of fighting. 
• Also, if my husband and I can model a good loving relationship that is filled with respect for one another, then our children can learn good relationship skills. They will learn not only how to relate to a spouse, but with their friends and family.
• Dressing and behaving modestly
• In today's world, so many girls and women have lost respect for their bodies. They dress to attract guys or act in ways they think will get someone to "love" them. The sad thing is the attention this behavior and clothing attracts is not "love" and is usually less than they deserve and could get from being true to themselves. I want more than anything to instill in my daughters a healthy respect for who they are as women of God. I want them to protect themselves from potential harm by dressing modestly and acting appropriately, but I also want them to know in their hearts that it is *who* they are that matters most - not how they dress, what they look like, or how flirty they can act. I hope I can teach them that they need to be true to who they are inside, and of course, I pray that I raise young ladies who are self confident, good, Christian girls with values and modesty. And the number one way to do that is to carry myself with the same values, modesty, and attitudes that I am trying to teach them.
• Looking well to the ways of your household
• This is an area I am still working on. I did not grow up in a clean house with good housekeeping routines in place. And because of that, I am still teaching myself how to set good routines that will help keep our house clean, and that I can teach our children good practices for housekeeping. If they don't start learning from a very young age, it will be harder to teach them when they get older. I pray that I am able to set a good example for my daughters on how to have a clean home and good routines that keep the entire household running smoothly. I have to remind myself that the things I do or do not do now have the potential to affect my daughters' households in the future, which then could be passed on to my future grandchildren etc. I have to decide now that I will do all I can to pass on good habits for my children, grandchildren, and so on.
• Speaking kindly to unkind people
• We all encounter unkind people in our lives, and human nature is to respond to them with the same attitude they are giving us. But that is not how Jesus expects us to respond. When our children are faced with those unkind people, they will respond in like manner unless they have been specifically taught and seen model behavior of the proper way to respond. It takes a lot of training to go against human nature, and therefore it is very important for me to always show my daughters how to be kind when faced with unkind people.
• Reaching out to the poor and needy
• Children often learn judgmental attitudes from their parents' behavior - even if subtle. When we see a homeless person, or beggar, or someone else in need, our children see them too, and then they look to see what we do or don't do. If we ignore them, look away, or go out of our way to avoid them our children, then translate that into these are people we don't associate with and that in some form or fashion these people are bad or there is something wrong with them. And this is not the behavior Jesus teaches we should have. Jesus set the example for us that we are to feed those who are hungry, clothe the naked, house the homeless, visit the sick, etc. We must model the behavior Jesus expects of us for our children.
• Keeping a positive attitude, even in difficult circumstances
• Through life, we all - including our children - will encounter hardships, but it is how we handle these hardships that define the kind of person we are. If we want our children to be positive people who are able to grow and come out of hardships a stronger person, then we have to show them how to do that. If we are always negative and out of control when we face hardships, our children will not learn healthy ways of dealing with these trials.
• Giving honor to your parents and your in-laws
• As parents, we all want our children to respect us and obey us. We can tell them that the Bible says so all we want, but if they see us disrespecting our own parents, they will have a hard time finding respect for us. If we want our children to respect us, we must respect our parents as well.
• Turning off the TV
• There are so many inappropriate things on TV these days. If our children see us watch things without hesitation, they will consider those actions, words, and ideas acceptable. We must demonstrate for our children what things we should or should not allow into our minds by censoring the things we see on TV. If our children see us turn something off because it has bad language or inappropriate content, they will have a clearer picture of what we should and should not allow into our minds. 
• Telling the truth
• This one falls heavily into the "actions speak louder than words" category. We expect our children to always tell the truth, and we discipline them if they lie. But if our children catch us lying, how are we to expect them to always tell the truth? 

All in all ... as a mother to two daughters, I must model good Christian behavior if I want my daughters to grow up to be good Christian woman.

Source the article was found: Homelife magazine July 2010

What a Week ....

I can't believe how quickly weeks seem to fly these days. But I think it has something to do with how much we cram so much into our days!
A little recap of our week goes a bit like this ...
Saturday, the day after going to Marbles, was just "one of those days" for Mommy. Daddy worked most of the day, we were exhausted from an already busy week, Kathryn cut her second tooth and all these teethy problems made her quite cranky, Carissa wanted Mommy all to herself and showed me the definition of a "typical 2 year old." This was a day I cherished bedtime!
Sunday, I got up early to finish getting all of our stuff together for our busy day (and thankfully this went smoothly thanks to all my FLYing lately!), went to church, grabbed lunch on the go, and traveled the two and a half hours to visit our favorite photographer, Lisa at Simply Southern Photography ( http://simplysouthernstudio.com/ ). We had a fun time taking pictures for Carissa's 2nd Birthday and Kathryn's 3rd Month! As always, it was well worth our drive and we enjoy getting to visit with friends. We had dinner together and let Carissa and Jonah (Lisa and Keith's son who is about 3 months younger than Carissa) run around outside and play together! I thoroughly enjoy seeing her get so excited about playing with friends her age! They enjoyed riding in the wagon together, shrieking, jabbering, and outright giggling! They found "shiny rocks," tried to open doors of this random building, and smelled the pretty flowers.
After a while of letting them play, we had to say our "good byes" to make the long trek back home ... which was made even longer by a teething 3 month old and a nap-less 2 year old tag team screaming and Handy Manny theme song on repeat! Woo, what a fun drive! :)
We finally made it home at 10pm that evening ... just in time for Daddy to catch the last hourish of the Redskins game. Because the girls had been wound tight from the ride, we let them stay up to relax with us. Daddy found himself a new football loving buddy! She sat with Daddy on the "couch" to "watch Game" and she cheered right along with Daddy! She learned "First Down" and "Touch Down" and of course "Oh no" and "Come on!" She has also learned to say "Go Redskins." (She also learned "Go Gators" for Mommy and seems to quite enjoy saying that one without prompting!) We are raising her right :) After the game, she went to bed. When she woke up the next morning, we asked her if she wanted to watch Disney Channel ... and she said, "Watch Game!" Daddy is thrilled!
Monday - Mommy worked on FLYing and did some grocery shopping. ... And Kathryn decided it was time to start a growth spurt! We also introduced a tiny bit of rice cereal once a day for her - which she LOVES. She already tries to grab the spoon and feed herself.
Tuesday - more growth spurt and FLYing/reorganizing of parts of my living area.
Wednesday - end growth spurt - finally some sleep! Did some shopping for Carissa's party. And my church/work day.
Which brings us to today! I knew my Nana, Grandpa, and Aunt & Uncle were planning to leave this morning to come up, well I found out they decided to leave last night to spend today with us. (For once I didn't freak out about my house! It was already clean and ready for company yay!) They called at 5:30 this morning to say they were already in Clayton. I went ahead and got up and waited for them. When they arrived, I went out to greet them. All of a sudden, my sister, Kaley, came running around the side of the van! They completely surprised me! I had no idea she was coming up. .... Even DAVID knew for a couple days that she was coming!! I visited with them a while, Kathryn woke up at 6:30, nursed, and I began my day FLYing. Carissa just LOVES playing with Auntie Kaley, and loves her Ninny. Slowly warming up to everyone else.
Everyone but Kaley, went to the hotel to rest and I was able to start and finish all of the goody bag totes for Carissa's friends for her party. It's been a fun and long day!
Tomorrow holds a mini-party for Carissa to open presents from Florida family since they brought a lot (give her shifts instead of opening everything at her party), lunch out to Golden Corral, and then I get to organize and make final prep for Carissa's party!
It is so weird. I already feel ahead of the game on getting ready for her party, but it's because I am not used to NOT procrastinating. I usually am working on stuff the day before and cramming it all in the night and morning of. After finishing a lot of stuff today, I told David that I felt like her party was tomorrow!
I am so looking forward to my sweet darling's Minnie Mouse birthday party on Saturday!! I doubt I will blog anything until after that party ... so be on the look out for fun stories and pictures from her party!

"Markles" and That Thing Called 'Sleep'

First things first .... sleep is a major topic of interest when a wee one is in the house. Our precious Kathryn had settled into a nice routine of sleeping from 11-7. While it left very little "Mommy Time" or "Mommy and Daddy Time," it was acceptable because it meant Mommy could sleep 6-8 hours of uninterrupted sleep. As of late, our darling has decided it's time to settle into a "normal routine" ... one that includes an earlier bedtime. I am thrilled that she is finally starting to settle into a predictable nap schedule, having so much more awake time during the day, and I do love having evenings to unwind and relax (and spend time with my hubby). The "joy" that comes along with changing the norm with a 3 month old is working out the kinks! Right now, that means learning how to go to sleep (and sleep all night), without waking til morning. Yay for an earlier bedtime, but boy it's making it harder on mommy waking up twice a night again after being spoiled with uninterrupted sleep. I was doing so well with waking up at 6:30-7 with her and staying awake after she drifted back to sleep, until she decided she needs to wake up at 1am, 5am, and 6:30 again. I am just plain too pooped to get out of bed at 6:30 for the day and have been drifting back to sleep with her. Boy that really puts a damper on my nice routines I was putting into place. Our peanut went to bed at 9pm tonight (after having a semi-cluster nursing before bed). Here's to hoping for a full night of sleep!

Now onto "Markles." I am sure you are wondering what in the world I am referring to. Today we took Carissa on a field trip to Marbles Kid's Museum. When we told Carissa we were going to Marbles, she kept trying to combine "marbles" and "markers" together, and it came out as "Markles." So the whole way there, she kept asking for "markles." We had a blast.
We decided to forgo nap time today in hopes of missing the "school field trip crowds" and arrived at Marbles around 2pm.
Our first stop was the Splash exhibit! Of course Carissa LOVED it because of all the water! This child loves water! She first spotted the fountain outside, so we ventured out to see the water. There they also had a display for hydro-power. Carissa got to take the boat to the top and watch the water move the boat down to the end. After a while, she gave up on the slow moving boat and decided that it was more fun to scoop the water with the cup.




Her next favorite place was the submarine. She loved all the buttons she could push, the "lab" where she could look at a "specimen" under the black light using the tongs, and looking through the periscope. Daddy tried to take her on the pirate ship, but to his dismay she just drug him back to the submarine :) Poor Daddy :(






Next was the garden! Our little girl already loves to water plants, so we were excited to see they had a place for her to water plants. She picked up the first watering can, dipped into the bucket of water and dumped it all on the plant a couple times. Sat that can down, and moved onto the next. She did this with about 3 or 4 watering cans. I love that she has a love for nature!




We then moved on to the Around Town exhibit. Here she got to play with a train set, dress up and put on a show (well, she put on the galoshes and played on the stage), glue an art page, drive the fire truck, boat, car, and ambulance, see dinosaurs, go down a slide, and shop for some groceries. Her favorites were driving the car and the boat! :)
The whole time Carissa was playing, Kathryn was enjoying watching her every movement. It will be so neat to see the two of them run around playing together.




Once we finally convinced her to go see another exhibit, we stopped briefly in the Storybook Forest. Kathryn seemed to enjoy this exhibit more than Carissa. Carissa did not want us to stop, and sit down to read. She wanted to play! But Kathryn just LOVED it when Daddy started reading to her. At least until Carissa decided she'd had enough of that exhibit and headed off to the next. It was in this moment that David laid down my camera, almost to never be seen again. What was a great day almost ended tragically when alllllll of my pictures from the day went missing. It was at this point that I have no more pictures to upload - until I can get some from David's phone. Luckily though as we were about to leave (had to stop in the potty for Carissa), and when we came out someone was turning my camera into lost and found! What a relief!! I told David that I am going to stop letting him use my camera. I always end up needing my camera fixed or a new one because of him ;) But he lucked out this time :-D

The rest of the time was spent exploring neat things like making cars go down ramps, playing with Frigits (cool magnets that you can set up in such a way that when you drop a marble in it, the marble travels down the path from one piece to the next), a kitchen area, and sports area. Carissa had a blast in the kitchen area. She cooked, and stirred, and "ate," and made smoothies in the blender. But the cutest thing was seeing her wear a chefs hat. She had so much fun playing!
We have talked about getting the membership and taking her here often. She had a GREAT Day!
And afterward, as we were driving away both her and Kathryn fell asleep.
Although, we didn't travel home just yet. We stopped in and bought her a "pink bicycle" (aka tricycle) for her birthday. She is in love with it already! Hopefully it will escape her mind until next Saturday because we are hiding it tonight while she is sleeping so we can present it to her at her party! I am so thrilled that 6 months ago when we decided that her birthday would be a good time to get her a trike, we couldn't have been more right about the timing! She is in love with "bicycles" ... now we just have to teach her to use the pedals! :)It truly has been a wonderful family day!! I love when David and I both have the same day off! :)

3 Months and a Tooth

Our little Kathryn has decided that she must exceed all the bars that were set before her by her big sister. Our sleeping champ went to bed last night at 9:30 and woke at 12:45 to nurse. We expected her to nurse and fall right back to sleep - but no such luck. Our peanut seemed to fight sleep, and she cried and cried. Carissa has meticulously hidden the bottle of teething tablets, so I finally broke down at 2am to give our teething girly some Tylenol. We finally got some sleep. This morning after changing her diaper, I decided to rub those sore gums. Lo and behold - I felt a tiny little hard bump that was not there the night before! That's right! To celebrate her three month birthday Kathryn cut her very first tooth!
Carissa did not cut her first until she was 5 months old and had 8 teeth by 8 months old. I am so interested to see what else we have in store with our little overachiever. She seems to be hitting every milestone sooner than Carissa .... does that translate to a mobile child earlier? Hmm.... I don't know if I should be excited or worried. I do look forward to the day that Kathryn can prove to be a playmate for Carissa ... but then that just means double trouble!
Oh I just love my baby girls!

September Already?!

Where has the time gone? I feel like every time I sign in to Blogger I am writing that! I always seem to have intentions to fervently blog, but again life happens and I don't make the time. As I am restructuring my daily routines around the teachings of The FLYlady, I plan to set aside a designated time each evening to blog - even if it is a short blog. I encourage my faithful followers to hold me to this! If you haven't seen a posting from me in a while - call me out! :) Everyone needs help staying on track every now and then.

So a brief catch up!

Tomorrow marks the completion of Kathryn's THIRD month with us! Really? Has it been that long? It sure has flown. I am finding that with two children, my months fly even quicker than they did with just one. I am definitely loving my life as Mommy of two. I could not ask for any more perfect daughters than the two little girls God has blessed me with.
Kathryn has mastered rolling from belly to back like a professional. In fact, she mastered this task a whole two months earlier than Carissa did. And as of today, our little busy body has succeeded in rolling from back to belly! (FOUR months earlier than Carissa!!) This new skill of hers still needs a little work - she is practicing rolling with enough momentum to get that arm out from underneath her. She has been successful 3 times after a little bit of work. I really think she is going to hit a lot of physical milestones earlier than Carissa - which is to be expected. After all, she is watching Big Sister show her all sorts of cool tricks!
Our little peanut is a talker for sure - much like the rest of our household! She loves to carry on conversations - and sometimes it doesn't matter if anyone is reciprocating. I love listening to her to get louder and louder, as if practicing this new found talent. And boy do I love her giggles! And her smiles are priceless. She is SUCH a happy baby! I have been so blessed to have two happy, well-adjusted little girls.

Miss Carissa is a hoot and a half! Can you believe she will be TWO in less than two weeks?!?! I feel like we just celebrated her first birthday, and now it's party time again! She is definitely exerting her two year old independence. She can be a handful at times, but she learns quickly from discipline (i.e. Time Out). She has started protesting, but after being consistent she finally sits in her chair, calms down, tells me "done," and gives me a hug. Those moments reassure me that it is working.
This little girlie is super smart! I know every parent says that about their child, but I am still going to brag on mine! :) She can say almost every word you ask her to say (within reason - she hasn't mastered "antidisestablishmentarianism" yet despite Daddy's prodding). And when I say she can "say the word," I don't mean she has a cute little way of saying them. She pronounces words almost dead on with some minor exceptions. She can say words like "Alligator" "grasshopper" and they sound perfect. She copies almost every word she hears! This girl even says "Disney Channel!" But not only does she just copy random words ... she makes 3-5 word sentences - filled with verbs, nouns, pronouns, articles, participles, etc! I told her one day that I needed to clean her room today. The next few days she went around saying "clean the room today."
She also has a wonderful memory! We went to Kentucky to visit some of my side of the family in the middle of August and when we got home that's all she could talk about. While we were there, she rode the tractor with her cousin Trey (and Great-Grandpa), and she saw cows, she went to her cousin Jaxon's house, and she saw Uncle Ricky. She STILL is talking about "Ride tractor ... Trey.... Fun ... see cow" ... "Jaxon's house" ... "Uncle Ricky" ... and she will get upset with me because she wants to ride the tractor with Trey or go to Jaxon's house. I have to explain to her that they are all in Kentucky (which used to be "Cowtucky" lol ... now it's "Kentucky").
We have started preschool homeschooling with her. Mostly I am just doing an introduction of things with her, and giving her some constructive projects to work on. I have always taught her through play, so now I have just created a "plan" about what my teaching goals are ... and we just see where the day leads us. We do a theme for each month (this month is Wild Animals - which will be followed up with a Zoo trip at the end of the month!! yay!), and each day we do a different letter, color, and number (1-10), and each week we learn about a new shape! She is loving the different craft projects, and learning about the different animals. She loves to try to count with us (her favorite is "count pasta"). And she is learning her ABCs! Right now her ABC's consist of ... "ABC ... HIJ .... QRST ... WXYZ" all in one breath. But it's a start! :) Her favorite colors right now are pink, purple, orange, and blue :) She has the different colored bowls, plates, silverware, and cups (Munchkin brand), so we ask her what color she wants and it's usually one of those choices.
I could go on and on, but I guess I should find a stopping point.
Hopefully you will be seeing a lot more from me!

Carissa Dances! :)

Time Flies ... !

One year ago from now, I was half way through a pregnancy that would ultimately change my world forever! And here we are ... approaching Carissa's 9th month of life outside of the womb. I cannot believe how much she has changed, grown, and turned into a little person in these last 9 months!
She once upon a time laid helpless in my arms and relied on me to do everything for her. Now, she is determined to do everything herself!
She insists on feeding herself ... she wants to go where she wants to go when she wants to go there and she wants to be the one to go there (if I help her, she decides that's not what she wanted!).
Carissa is working on learning to pull herself up to a standing position. We don't have many things the right height in our house for her, but she has managed to pull herself up in the bathtub - although a bit slippery at times.
I am thinking she may just skip the whole crawling thing all together. She scoots and pushes and pulls and turns .... but no crawling. She'd much rather be standing! In fact ... more and more frequently, she has stood unsupported for like 2 seconds!! That's major progress!! And she loves trying to walk ... holding our hands of course! But she's a pro! Before long I am sure she will be walking!! And she's only 8 1/2 months!!! WOW!
Carissa has SEVEN teeth and I believe she has one on the way!! Definitely a mouthful ... which leads to her love for eating anything - ESPECIALLY mommy and daddy's food! I have officially STOPPED mashing her food. She mostly feeds herself with her fingers. She does like the baby forks, and if we put a piece of food on her fork and hand her the fork, she moves directly to her mouth with the food and eats it off the fork!! Amazing!
And let's not forget that she is going to be a world-class talker! She is working on "bye bye" now. Of course it sounds more like "ba ba ba" ... but she repeats it in response to us saying "bye bye" - which reminds me - She WAVES bye bye! :)
She still doesn't directly call us "ma ma" or "da da" but she definitely tries. Sometimes I think it coincidentally comes out though. And sounds like she says "hi." She babbles up a storm all day long! And she knows what she is saying ... boy I really wish I knew what she was saying. So much personality!!!
She is still nursing ... but only about 3 times a day. I certainly cherish those sessions so much! It saddens me to think that this will one day come to a stop.
My heart swells every time I think about that little girl ... let alone when I get to love on her. I miss her like crazy when I have to be away from her - which reaffirms my decision to work part time at church and stay home with her on a daily basis! God has blessed me so much to allow me to have the job I want while simultaneously having an abundance of time to be the kind of mother I've always dreamed of being!
I have finally gotten things figured out to keep my house in order, while balancing with my weekly church duties, in such a way that I have plenty of time during the day to sit down and play with Carissa without feeling like I am neglecting other duties. It's a wonderful feeling of contentment and accomplishment!
My life has been so blessed over these past 9 months. I have learned a kind of love I never knew before. A kind of love that always brings tears of happiness to my eyes when I think about how much I love my precious Carissa!!
At times it seems like it would be difficult to ever love another child as much as I do her, but then I think about how much joy it will bring me to see Carissa be a big sister. I know with all my heart that God's plan for my life all along was to be a mother and I thank Him everyday for this calling! It's been the best thing that has ever happened to me!!

Happy Birthday, David

I know one normally reflects back over the years when it's his/her own birthday, but for some reason today - on David's birthday - I started reflecting back over the years.
Here we are, celebrating David's 23rd birthday ... and we were just 14 years old when we met! Almost NINE years ago we met! I cannot believe how fast time has flown. I laughed and told David that in five years we will have known each other for half our lives, and from then on we will always have known each other longer than we didn't know each other. Funny the things we think about while driving down the road.
So much has happened over these last 9 years! I can't believe all we've done together. I am so fortunate that I found the love of my life so early and we are still together going just as strong as ever!
Recap of the last nine years:

• World Changers Savannah, GA 2000 - We met!
• November 25, 2000 - David and his mom drive down to Greensboro to see me the day after my 15th birthday! It was our first time seeing each other after World Changers. We sat on the couch and talked for 2 hours! :-D ... Oh yeah, and he brought me Halo - white angel bear beanie baby (Totally still have that somewhere around here)
• March 24, 2001 - David's 15th birthday! I had this big plan to surprise him. His birthday coincided with my Spring Break, so my dad and I drove up to surprise him. We stayed in Greensboro - only to find out that David's mom and grandmother were on their way to pick me up because Jon had cheerleading competition so there had been a slight change of plans. I stayed the night at Grandma Patsy's and the come over the next morning to pick "her/us" up ... and he comes in and is "surprised" -------- YEAH RIGHT ... I found out a year and a half later that he actually wasn't surprised because his grandmother accidentally spilled the beans - but he acted surprised for me.
  
• November 20-something, 2001 - my 16th birthday! David's parents meet up with my grandparents and David rides down with my grandparents for my birthday and Thanksgiving. (PS we are still "just friends" during all this time) We actually had a discussion during this visit about our "friendship" ....... I like to define this as the part in our relationship where the path we were traveling on split and we started taking the fork that was "more than friends."
• March 20-something, 2002 - David's 16th birthday! It once again coincided with my spring break so my family drove to Greensboro, and then the next day my dad, Kasey, Kaley and I all drove up to VA. David knew I was coming ... but I don't think he knew exactly when. We got there while he was still at Karate Practice, so his parents brought us down there to surprise him! YAY! I think in all our 9 years I've surprised him once! lol
• End of June-July 5, 2002 - Centrifuge and hanging out! ... I met David's youth group in Panama City, Florida for Centrifuge, and then he came down to spend a week with us. We went to KY for 4th of July where David's parents met us. It was during this time that we "secretly held hands" for the first time. We pretty much were "more than just friends" by this point.
• July 10, 2002 - He asked me to be his girlfriend! Of course ... it was a lot bigger a decision than that lol. We talked a lot about if that was what we should do. All of our family was telling us we were pretty much boyfriend/girlfriend anyways - just without the titles. So we decided to add the title! Of course... this date is also momentous because it is the day David broke his 16 year record of being single ........ and for the first time ever in his life had a girlfriend (I sure hope he doesn't wish he ever had more than just me :-D lol)
• Dec. 2002 - Our first visit after officially becoming boyfriend and girlfriend :-D David and his mom came down to Florida to visit! :-D
• February 2003 ... I went to visit Campbell for the first time. He met us down in Greensboro for dinner and to hang out for a couple hours!
  
• *Don't remember dates off the top of my head* ......... Junior Proms 2003 .............. He flew down for mine :-D and I flew up for his! :-D Wonderful times!
• Dec. 2003 - I flew up to visit. This was also the time we first hiked Sharp Top! :)
• Senior Proms 2004 ...... again ... he flew down for mine ... and I flew up for his! Loved every minute!!
• July 2004 - Campbell Freshman Orientation!
• August 2004 - COLLEGE! WE GET TO SEE EACH OTHER EVERY DAY! WOOT! Many good times (and the few arguments haha) .... we'd spend holidays together alternating whose house we were at when. Separate for the summers :( with occasional visits to see each other.
• February 24, 2006 - He Proposes!!! :-D
• June 23, 2007 - We get hitched! :) and then go on our wonderful honeymoon to Emerald Isle, NC.
• January 23, 2008 - We find out we are excpecting a baby!
• April 11, 2008 - We close on our first home!
• April 29, 2008 - We learn our baby will be Carissa Hope.
• September 21, 2008 - We welcome Carissa into our lives!
• And here we are ... almost 9 years later .... living our dream life! :-D

I am the luckiest girl in the world! I love my husband with my whole heart!! He makes me so happy! He is the best! And now him and I have formed a wonderful family with a darling daughter ... and someday more children! But for now, I am extremely happy with my life! :)
I love you David!! :)
Happy Birthday!

From Observant to Interactive

SIX MONTHS! Can you believe it?
6 Months ago today I was walking walking walking ... trying to convince my little girl that it was time. And here I am now, trying to convince her to not grow up so fast!
I have thoroughly enjoyed every minute of watching Carissa develop and grow. It is amazing! She has always been interested in what is going on around her. Ever since she was born she was very observant. We always had to hold her so she could see everything.
And now ... 6 months later ... she still is very interested in everything around her. However, she is no longer satisfied with just looking at it! Carissa refuses to believe that she is a baby with limited mobility! Our world now consists of touching everything ... trying to eat everything ... talking to everything ... trying to go everywhere!
We have to really hold on to her as she has no concept of falling. If she sees something she wants, she literally throws her body towards it.
It is really exciting to see her so interested in the world around her. She is able to self-entertain. She loves to laugh and play. She babbles as if she really knows what she is saying. She absolutely adores her kitties and puppies (granted we are having to teach her to not pull their fur! :-D).
Carissa is rolling over from front to back. She scoots. She lunges. She is mastering sitting up on her own. She loves to stand (holding onto something of course)! Her favorite thing to play in is her Jumperoo! She loves to bounce! She LOVES the baby in the mirror ... and the more excited she gets about seeing the baby, the more that baby in the mirror gives her reason to be excited!
She is a social butterfly ... especially with other kids! She will grab at them and babble away at them! She is eating solids ... still nursing ... and sleeping all night!
She is the joy of my life! And I can't believe we are halfway to her first birthday!
And now she is telling me that it is her dinnertime! I guess I better go feed her!

Restructuring Life Priorities

Proverbs 19:21 (NIV)
"Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails."

Proverbs 19:21 (Missie's Remix)
"If you follow God's plan for your life, there will be detours from what you planned."

Once upon a time, it was my dream to be a physical therapist. I went to World Changers one summer and God said, "Nope! I want you to go and be my hands and feet to youth and children." Following his calling I was led to Campbell University in North Carolina -where, consequently, David decided to go as well. I worked diligently on my undergrad and was able to receive my Bachelor of Arts in Religion and Christian Ministries with honors.
Amidst all this studying, David and I felt God calling us to take a further step in our relationship and become husband and wife. In my mind, there was no reason that I could not be a student and a wife at the same time. So I made plans to continue with my education to work on my Master's of Divinity. I thought for sure this is what God wanted me to do.
Little did I know ... God was already putting his plan in motion. I was still working at Samaria Baptist Church when we got married, we were living in Angier, and we were both in school. I thought we had it all figured out. But then October after we got married, my body reacted horribly to the birth control that I was on. The birth control actually caused my body to mimic pregnancy symptoms. This was the first time we had ever thought about what it would be like to have a baby sooner ... and knowing that it was a real possibility for that to happen. Even after my body finally started stabling out to normal, we continued to think about this possibility of a baby in our lives. After the birth control fiasco, my body ended up skipping an entire cycle. Was I pregnant? Why wasn't I having a period? Why were the tests negative? What's wrong with me? (All of the funkiness birth control caused my body to go through, I feel God used to allow us some time to think about what our lives would look like with a baby and how we would manage.) We finally agreed that if it was God's will for us to have a baby we would have one ... and we decided to leave it up to God. After we found that peace with God ... we waited.

*Interlude*
While we were dealing with all of these thoughts, my work life was going through changes! I had been working part time at Samaria Baptist Church as the Minister of Youth and Children. But they were having financial problems and decided to let go of a couple staff members. At first it was hard to deal with ... but I decided to look for something better. (Little did I know at the time, but God really had his hand in all of this.) From things I hear through the grapevine, I'm glad we got out when we did. My plan after losing my job was to look for a full time job. I heard from a couple churches ... including an email from this one church looking for a part time position. I didn't prioritize that email at first because I was looking for a full time job.
*Back to Story*


And then, lo and behold, I decide to test again ... and voila! The little plus sign immediately appeared! Could it be? Are you serious? Oh my goodness!! Is it really happening?! Because I had already found that peace with God and I knew that David and I had already talked about the possibility that this might happen, I was able to see that plus sign without any feelings of turmoil! A smile crept onto my face and I was stoked! I was going to be a mom!! Ever since I was a little girl I always had that special touch with little babies and little kids. I always dreamed about the day that I would have my wonderful husband ... and my beautiful children. And all of a sudden my dream was coming earlier than I used to plan! Obviously ... God's plan was different than mine. But hey! He knows best, right?
So, the reality continued to sink in over the next 9 months.
Knowing that I would be a mom ... a full time job didn't seem so feasible anymore. And then one day I got this call from a church ... the same church that sent me that email a few weeks prior looking for a part time Minister of Youth and Children. The funny thing about this offer was ... they were calling to request my resume ... and to set up a meeting. They were given my name from a member of Samaria and decided to contact me first! So God was setting up forces beyond my control. I decided to meet with them and everything fell into place! It is a great place for us ... esp starting a family!
We also realized that we should start looking at a more permanent home for us to have a family. So we bought a house closer to Raleigh where I worked ... and David was able to transfer to the Clayton store.
I thought I had everything figured out. I took the fall semester off from Campbell when Carissa was born. Then I would return in the spring. I would take 9 hours. And just take my time through school. I knew I didn't need my degree until my kids were older, as I didn't plan on working full time until they are all in school - and I want 5 kids, so it will be a while! David and I worked our schedule so that we didn't have to put Carissa in daycare and we had everything worked out for when we had classes.
What I did not plan on was the undesire to do any work at home - or the lack of time. I really tried to make things work. I was getting by with good grades ... but I knew I could do better. I finally hit a brick wall halfway through the semester. I knew I needed to rethink things when I couldn't sit down and write a 4 page Book Review or a 4 page Reflection Paper. (Especially when I used to be able to sit down and write a 10-15 page paper without a second thought!)
I struggled for a while with my options. I was never one to quit something - especially school. I prayed. I talked to David. I talked to my mom. Both of whom reassured me that they support me in whatever I decide. I was joking about "Dropping Out" and David said, "It's not so much that you are dropping out as restructuring your priorities."
How right he was! That statement helped me to refocus on God. Before Carissa, I was set in living my life. Yes, I thought I was doing what God wanted ... but it had been a while since I stopped to check with Him. Obviously, giving us Carissa and a new job and a new home should have made me stop and check in with God to see if I was still doing what He wanted. Having a child changes everything! My life is no longer just about me ... or even about David and I. It's about raising our daughter to be a Child of God. I think long ago God made it the desire of my heart to be an active caretaker and teacher to my children. It became obviously clear that there was no way for me to be a productive student and the kind of homemaker that I felt called to do at the same time - at least not now.
As soon as I decided that God wished for my priorities to become more focused on creating a Godly Family, this undescribable peace came over me! It's amazing when you experience truly knowing you are right where you are supposed to be. And it takes such a weight off when your priorities become aligned with God's plan!
So I am making a detour from what I orginally planned ... but it's okay because I'm following what God has planned for me!